Honest Engagements Work!

This is not a report of two young lovers jumping into a relationship or marriage quickly.  Jason and Marianne had both been married and divorced once, both had children from their first marriages, and both worked very hard at their jobs.  They were in their late thirties and were determined that their next marriage would last for the rest of their lives.

Although the couple were powerfully attracted to each other from their first meeting, they were mature enough to take any thoughts of a lasting commitment slowly.  For over a year, they dated casually, then exclusively, forming a deep friendship.  Marianne was very active in her church; she told Jason it was very important to her.  Jason joined her in working with the church's youth group.  It soon also became his church, too. After marriage, they continued this work together and enjoyed it even more.

Jason traveled abroad quite a bit as part of his job.  After marriage, Marianne joined him, as she could.  By then, all of their children were grown and living on their own.  Jason had always wanted to work in Germany, where his company had a factory.  Before marriage, Jason asked Marianne, " If I were to get promoted and be sent to Germany, would you move with me?"  She loved Jason with all her heart and readily answered, "Yes.  I would move with you if that happens."

Now, after eleven years of a very happy marriage, Jason has actually been promoted to the job of his dreams - in Germany!  The minimum time he will be there will be four years.  Marianne is making plans to sell their home, quit her job, and move to Germany.  At first she mentioned how very much she will miss their children, grandchildren, church, and friends.  But then she added, "We'll be able to come home (to the States) twice a year.  This will just be different.  And everybody says they'll come visit us in Germany, too."

I was thrilled when Marianne asked me, "Would you come visit me?"  I did not hesitate, "Oh, yes, I'd love to!"

Lessons learned:  Honesty is critical in all levels of friendship!  Don't hold anything back; you must discuss issues, hopes, and plans that figure large in your life.

Dear Lord in Heaven, what you commanded us was, "Do not bear false witness."  This doesn't mean only saying true statements.  It could also mean, "Make sure you discuss important issues that may affect your relationships honestly."  Please bless all our relationships, especially our relationship with You!