Finally Growing Up!

Not until I was in my upper years of high school was I aware that there were unfortunates who were heroin addicts.  These creatures were so depraved, so distant from my world, I felt sorry for them and forgot about them entirely.  Enter the 'hippie' years of smoking pot, trying out hallucinogenic drugs to get 'high,' free love, protesting anything that could be protested.  Consider yourself lucky if you avoided those years!  By then, I had a full life with children and didn't worry about anything touching my family in my small town.  Sure, we all let our hair grow straight and long, didn't wear makeup, embroidered our jeans, but that was as far as it went.

Before I knew it, my older children were in high school.  And I was worried.  I could imagine that some depraved classmate would offer my innocents some illegal drug and that they might try it and get caught up in the vortex of the drug culture.  For years, I counseled them how dangerous it was to even try the drugs.  Finally, my daughter #1, Anna, told me, "Mom, we don't mix.  The straights stay together and the druggies stay together."  Guess I may have had more growing up to do than she did!

Again, when Anna was getting ready to go to the big city to the big university, I could imagine people from the various 'cults' such as the Moonies, trying to entice Anna into their captivity.  Before the end of the summer, Anna patiently asked me, "Mother, do you think I'm stupid?"  I had more growing up to do then, also.

Finally, son #1, Billy, joined the U.S. Navy when he was seventeen.  You didn't need parental permission if you were that old back then.  He had plans to start the December after he graduated from high school.  I was absolutely devastated!  I could imagine my dear boy getting shot at by the enemy, a thousand times.  I really suffered!  And so must have all my friends suffered because I couldn't seem to stop talking about it!  I had such a hard time letting go.

The day came when the crisply dressed Naval Officer came to pick up my son.  Billy was packed and ready.  He went and hugged and his sisters and his brother, John.  Then he and I hugged and we both started crying.  All of a sudden, we were still clinging to each other and he stopped crying and began comforting me, who could not stop sobbing.  I was aware, that in that moment, he became a man.  And I grew up again.  We all accompanied him out to the Navy man's car and waved him good-bye with smiles.

Billy told me later,  "Until that day, I didn't know how very much I was loved."

My dear Lord, remember how my Mom told me, "You had them fast.  They'll leave fast."  Now that they've all left home, help me treasure every moment, still keep contact, and let all my children, their spouses, and my grandchildren know they are still very much loved!  Please help us all spread our love to all we meet!

The Blizzards of Life

Sometimes you wake up to a winterland of white beauty.  A new snow has softly covered the grey-brown world of winter.  There are no footprints or tiretracks on the sparkling icing everywhere.

Then other times you open the curtains to a raging blizzard of white wind, blocking from view the other side of your street.  There is no snow on the tree skeletons for it's all blown off.  It is bleak.

Life can be like that, forces surrounding us, working to knock us down, freezing us to our bones.  Let's reflect now on the blizzards of our lives, the times when we have been pushed down by the storms in our marriages, families, jobs, natural disasters, or even our neighborhoods.  When the way out of deep problems seem obscure, how do we stand up and walk on?

For a time, in the beginning, not even "9-1-1" could get through to rescue us.  How will we climb out to safety, strength, and peace?

Prayer to our Lord God would always be our natural first reflex, our innate lifesaver. God, what can I do?  Where do I start?  I need your help, please!

My dear friend, Mary Ann, has a young daughter, Sherry, who proudly and blatantly proclaims herself an atheist. Mary Ann and Sherry were visiting a historic site on the most blistering of summer days.  Mary Ann, who's a bit overweight, had walked in the heat for hours.  Then they had to climb steep steps.  Halfway up, Mary Ann felt everything around her spinning, felt like she was going to pass out, and just quickly sat down on the concrete.  Sherry immediately and loudly cried out, "Oh, God, help her!"  A few minutes later, Mary Ann felt OK and they resumed their climbing, slower.

When we have devastating problems, perhaps a problem we've never before encountered, we want to hide it, hope it goes away, and are, frankly, ashamed and embarrassed.  There must have been something we could have done to prevent this disaster. We need to realize that everyone has problems.  That is life!  Now it's our turn.  It WILL pass!

It helps tremendously to share what we're going through with a trusted friend, clergy, family member, or professional counselor.  They will sympathize and comfort us.  They probably can't solve our problem for us, but perhaps they can shed new insights. This will certainly help decrease our sky-high stress level.

The last time I experienced a thoroughly traumatic event, I shared with an old friend at church.  She told me, "You would be surprised at all the people here who have a very similar problem."  That really helped me - I'm not alone!

It is harder to ask for help than to give help.  If we're 'down and out,' our friends would be honored if we asked for their temporary help.  Over the years, more than one of my friends has told me, "I appreciate you trusting me enough to share with me.  It means a lot to me.  I will help."

Depending on the nature of our problem, we may need to seek education to learn about our OPTIONS.  That was my very favorite word in counseling psychiatric patients.  There are ALWAYS, ALWAYS OPTIONS in every situation!  Take your time in discovering yours, choose wisely.  Pray for wisdom!

Oh, Lord God, here we are again, asking for your help!  My problem seems so insurmountable now that I think I will never smile again.  But I know without a doubt that you will show me the way because you love me as I love you.

The Really Long View

The more years one accumulates, the more one naturally thinks of death.  This is natural, this is good.  It gets us ready for the inevitable: our passing into a new life.

The only person my brothers and I asked how old he was going to live to be was my dad, Reuben.  He always said the same thing, "I'm going to live to be 89."  It seemed so old, like 1,000 years!  It was far away from us all.  My dad died in his 89th year!

One time, my teenage daughter #8, Jeannie, asked me, "Mom, how long are you going to live?"  I thought a minute and replied, "I think I'd like to be a hundred."   Jeannie then proposed, "Mom - why limit yourself?"  And, indeed, why limit myself!

My good friend, Dianne, recently reported that her mother, 83 years old, spends a lot of time caring for her 106-year-old mother!  Now, I ask you, why shouldn't I live at least that long!!

Dad and Mom (died at 82) had virtually no medical or dental care until dad's Army years. But even then, the care wasn't as good and as diligent as it is today. Dad, Mom, Grandma and Grandpa all lost their teeth and had to wear dentures in their forties!  

Grandma Marie died at age 82.  She was born in her parents' house and had no medical care until her final illness. Being a nurse, I've learned so much about health and am so motivated to try to take care of myself.  I wouldn't miss regular checkups, nor would I miss routine flu shots.

This has actually given me a new perspective on my life!  I've got a whole lot of time to accomplish what I would like to, what I think God wants me to do.  I don't need to be in a rush to do anything!

Of course, God may take me from this life today or tomorrow - I don't care when, I would welcome it! - or then, I may actually turn out to be a centenarian!

In your very comfortable hands, Oh, Lord, I am!

The Little Green Woman

Situation:  She was my dear friend, Louisa, and it took years for me to figure out what was her problem with me.  I'm not even sure she was aware of it herself.  Louisa was jealous and envious of me.  How do I know?  Whenever something good happened to me, no matter what it was, she'd downgrade it and 'rain on my parade.'

Years ago, our school system started a "Gifted and Talented" program.  Every mother I knew, including myself, thought ALL our children belonged in this program. We ALL helped ALL our children apply for this program.  After all, it would mean special classes and special attention, not to mention the honor of being in the program, for the children selected.  

At first, there were only a few openings per grade. The selection process was highly subjective.  In addition to good grades previously, the children had to demonstrate high interest in and a degree of competence in each area.  For example, to apply for the "Arts" categories, you had to demonstrate a dance, play a musical selection on your instrument of choice.  For "Academic" categories, like "Writing," you had to submit a piece you had written. 

I can't say whether or not the children cared at all about this program.  But we mothers did!  We loved our children, of course and felt they deserved it.  After months of waiting, the chosen were announced.  One of my children was the only child of the mothers in my circle who was chosen.  Everyone was so happy for me and congratulated me!  Everyone, that is, except Louisa.  With a scowl on her face, she very sarcastically told me, "How did YOU manage that!"  This implied I bribed the teachers or something of the sort.  I couldn't believe my ears and eyes!  She was positively green with jealousy!

Lessons learned:  When my daughters started having children who tried out for various teams and projects - and did well, they started having the same jealousy problems and asked me what to do.  I told them, "No one will be jealous of you or your child if you're fat, pimply, greasy, shy and just sit in a corner.  Go do your best and encourage the best in your children.  Someone will always try to drag you down.  Ignore it and go on."

For sure, I learned from my dear mom and grandmother who, while I was growing up and had jealousy problems, would tell me, over and over, "Consider the source."  In other words, if someone is mean and nasty to you, it's their problem!  Don't feel sad!  You know how good you are!

What exactly is 'envy?'  It is sadness over someone else's blessing.  Envy leads to jealousy which hopes for harm to the other person, like if the other person looks better, I look worse.  Sadness comes from the Devil himself!  What is the antidote for this: Joy!!

Outcome:  Although Louisa really tried to be nice to me and everyone, over the years to come, she destroyed what love I felt for her by more serious jealousies and baseless accusations.  In time, she moved far away and I felt no loss whatsoever. (I feel it is a tragedy of universal proportions to destroy any love!)

Our Take-away: It is God who gives us and our children various talents, gifts, and opportunities.  We are all different.  We can try our best with what we have.  We should celebrate everyone's triumphs!  We're all in the grand affair called 'life' together!

Lord God, we pray, thank you for whatever gifts you have bestowed on us.  Help us not be envious of those who have what we don't have.  We know you love us very much and give us every thing we need, in abundance!  Thank you, sweet Lord!  

Random Acts of Kindness - for Me!

Yesterday I woke up to another white world of a snowstorm.  It was snowing hard and everything was covered.  "Oh, well," I thought, "I'll just stay home today - change of plans."

I puttered around, eating breakfast, working at odd housework jobs, then mid-morning, I looked out the windows beside my front door.  Someone had shoveled the snow off my front porch, the steps, and the entire 2-car-wide driveway, clear out to the street!!  My newspaper, which is delivered at the end of my very steep driveway, was just outside the front door!   This was so beautiful to me that it took my breath away for an instant and brought tears to my eyes!

WHO could have done such a big job without me knowing, while I was still home?  How can you clear all that snow without making a lot of noise?  I was awake and I was home.  Yes, I was working at the back of the house.  I thought I heard someone on the front porch once, but I listened and decided it must have been a neighbor scraping his driveway.

If I had known who it was that performed such a kindness, I would have heaped lavish thanks upon the person and offered hot chocolate!  As it is, I may never know who to thank!

It has been so cold, so snowy, windy and icy for the past couple of weeks, mostly I just go outside once, to the mailbox (on the days it's delivered) when I know it's there, and pick up my newspaper at the end of the driveway, usually mid- to late-afternoon.  I have had to be very careful, slowly walking along the side of the driveway in the grass because my driveway is really steep.  And even then, I slip and slide some.

I have a snow shovel, a very sturdy one.  Once, I put up the garage door and looked down the driveway.  I thought of how long it would take me to clear the driveway.  The wind was blowing the snow sideways off the trees and the windchill was less than zero. Frostbite can happen quickly in weather like that.  I thought it would be prudent just to skip it and let the snow melt off eventually.

So, whoever it was that cleared all the snow and brought up my newspaper, many, many thanks!!

The only other time I recall a definite Random Act of Kindness, something wonderful done by an unknown person, happened on one of my church's Seniors' group's outings.  There was about thirty of us returning in a bus on I-64 west of Louisville, Kentucky. We had stopped for dinner at a restaurant overlooking the Ohio River.  The restaurant was large and filled nearly to capacity.  We enjoyed wonderful Southern cooking and had a grand time with each other.  It was special to watch the sun set over the river.  When we asked for our checks, the waitress said, "It's already paid for.  The gentleman was sitting over there."  And she pointed to a now empty block of seats.  Then, again, who could we thank?  With thirty of us, the bill must have been hundreds of dollars!  So, what could we do?  We said a few prayers for our benefactor.

My dear Lord, I pray, thank you for sending me this angel to clear the snow!  Please point out when I may be an angel to others!

On the Fence? #7

It's been an uphill battle to convince the American public that every stage of human life, from conception to a natural death, needs protection.  But we are gradually winning that important opinion from our fellow citizens!   All the national media polls show that more than 50% of the country thinks that abortion-on-demand is wrong!!  This has all the pro-death contingent running scared.  You know that when the governor of New York, on Friday, January 17, 2014, proclaimed in a speech that "extreme conservatives who are right-to-life, pro-assault weapon, anti-gay. . . have no place in the State of New York," we are doing something right!  That's OK, governor, we will protect your life also!

Another victory for Life is that over 200 laws have been made at the state level, nationwide, in the last year, to give more protection to the unborn.  This number is greater than the number of state bills passed in the last 40 years!  Yes, we are doing something right!

Due to our individual and collective effort and prayers, we have turned the tide of the Culture of Death!  What we need now is greater and more widespread effort, and a veritable TSUNAMI of PRAYERS!

What will once-and-for-all-times enshrine Legal Protection for All Human Life into our American laws?:
 A Human Life Amendment to our United States Constitution!  We can NEVER GIVE UP TILL THIS IS ACCOMPLISHED!!  When the time is right - and it is coming soon! - this amendment will be introduced into a more pro-life  Congress, pass both Houses, and be ratified by all 50 Pro-Life States!  We have much work to do.  Even a pro-death president and a pro-death Supreme Court couldn't veto this.

It wouldn't do any good to return to the pre-1973 Culture of Life.  In those times, yes, everyone knew right from wrong, and some chose wrong. But there was too much prejudice, too much condemnation, very little help for those families of all ages who needed it.  A woman pregnant without being married was socially shunned.  Men were encouraged to be 'play boys.'  It was all right to have the attitude, "Well, I think abortion is wrong and won't get one, but it's OK if you think you need one." Sad to say, sex was "anything goes."  We need a New, Genuine Culture of Life where women are respected, men are respected, children are nurtured, and real goodness can triumph!

A few things to consider to get us ALL out of our easy chairs, or at least, writing letters to our law makers from them!:

*We are accountable to our God.

*We want this beautiful world of ours to be SAFE not only for ourselves, but for our children, our grandchildren, and everyone.

*Due to the hundreds of millions of babies killed by abortion world-wide, we have lost for all time, many of the rare geniuses such as Einstein, Ghandi, Pasteur, etc.  Could one of them have discovered a cure for cancer?  Brought peace to all the nations? Composed music equal to or more wonderful than that of Mozart, Bach?

*We do not want Evil and the Devil to triumph!

*The billions of cash earned by baby-killing and elder-killing undoubtedly finances a vast array of crimes.  We have to cut off this cash flow.

*Many countries have below-replacement level of population.  We need to encourage Life!  Some of the countries are encouraging more children and giving cash incentives but it's not working so far.

*Our country of America has been a beacon of HOPE for the whole world!  We can return to that privileged status and export Life instead of helping other countries kill their babies.

*Chinese is a difficult language to learn and I'm too old.  What about you?

*IF YOU DON'T FIGHT FOR LIFE, WHO WILL?

Lord of All, 2014 may well be the tipping point for America!  Help us fight for Life!  Give us the will, the fortitude, and the love to persist in our works and prayers!  We look forward to sitting down with you one day, and recounting all our exciting victories!

On the Fence, #6

Yesterday we listed plenty of Pro-Life groups doing fantastic work to protect all of us: the most vulnerable, unborn babies, clear up to us adult/old people.  Now we need to seriously ponder: what ACTION does God want me to take?  How can I, personally help?  Maybe we have just a few resources, maybe we are blessed with much.  Perhaps we have health and energy, perhaps not.  We can all, if we can read this, do things on the internet and PRAY!  Let's pray that we will listen to what God wants us to do.  He will give us the courage, the resources!  God doesn't call the qualified, he QUALIFIES THE CALLED!

1.  Whatever group(s) you're interested in, there are certainly differing levels of involvement.  You can only pay your dues and get their newsletter and notices about upcoming events.  You can go to their meetings.  You can help in many ways.  You may choose to help at events.  This is really fun!  It's good to gather with like-minded folks.  After the Rally at the courthouse here in Lexington last week, the whole group went across the street to a school cafeteria and enjoyed hot chocolate and cookies!  It was good to see old friends.

2.  When we educate ourselves, we are taught to use accurate words.  What exactly is a 'fetus?'  It is a medical term for the unborn baby three months to birth.  People are dehumanized using certain words.  We need to call a baby a baby!  What about the term, 'abortion?'  It is a surgical procedure.  It would be better to say 'induced baby-killing' or something similar.  Then there's 'reproductive health clinic,' a.k.a. abortion mill.  I think 'baby-killing chamber' states the real purpose: murder of the innocents!  You can be creative.

3.  It will help if we promote CHASTITY whenever we can.  Dawn Eden's book, "The Thrill of the Chaste: Finding Fulfillment While Keeping Your Clothes On, " Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2006, is most excellent!  She is a New York City writer who bought into the 'Sex and the Single Girl' mentality and had years of one-night stands with men who didn't care for anything but her body. She realized how empty her life was, converted to Christianity and writes convincingly about the beauty of and benefits of chastity.

4.  Make double-sure we are registered to vote in our precinct at our present address.  We could get involved with the political party of our choice.  They always can use help!  I told you about my quest last fall: it was fun!  And I met ALL my neighbors!

5.  Write, write, write letters to senators, congressmen and state officials.  This cannot be overdone!  Internet's faster.

6.  Pray, pray, pray!  PRAYER IS THE POWER OF THE UNIVERSE!  Who better to ask help from than God Almighty!  Never give up - he didn't give up on us!

Lord, we've got a big job ahead of us.  We need laws to protect us all.  We need to stop the evil.  We know that good is stronger than evil.  Give us the strength to do what you want us to do.  Thank you!

On the Fence? #5

On Good Groups (Pro-Life), Bad Groups (Pro-Death):  As I write this, Wednesday, January 22nd, I'm watching the 40th Annual March for Life in Washington, D.C. on EWTN-TV.  You may have never heard of it due to scant coverage by major media.  The march actually passes in front of their headquarters.  Sure, a dozen pro-death advocates will get great press coverage and pro-life activities will get little or no mention except by Catholic, Evangelical Christian sources, EWTN-TV and FOX-TV.  What does that tell us about the major media (ABC, NBC, & CBS)?  They must be overwhelmingly pro-death!  They like to call themselves "pro-choice."  But what is exactly the "choice?": kill unborn babies.  They never support a woman who chooses the life of her baby and better health for herself.

Due to the severe snowstorm on the east coast, March for Life had many buses that cancelled, plus cancelled air flights.  Nevertheless, several commentators mentioned that it seemed like even more marchers than ever were there, several hundred thousand.

It was good to see Dr. Alveda King on the March for Life coverage.  She is the niece of Dr. Martin Luther King.  She herself had two abortions which she bitterly regrets.  She is the director of African-American Outreach of Priests for Life organization.   Dr. Alveda King said that her uncle would have never supported abortion-on-demand.  In 1967, the great Civil Rights leader said, "We love people.  We won't kill people."  Alveda said she is gratified that many more African-Americans are realizing the genocide of abortion on their communities and joining pro-life efforts, particularly young people.  Alveda said that presently, one-third of blacks are aborted!

With Dr. King on TV was Rev. Dean Nelson, leader of the National Black Pro-Life Coalition.

The March for Life TV coverage showed the testimony of a woman who had considered aborting her daughter but changed her mind.  With her was her daughter and her three grandchildren.

The young people at the March said over and over, "Generations are being killed."

This year's theme for the March for Life was "Adoption, the Honorable Option."

There's a new pro-life group formed by children conceived as a result of rape or incest of their mothers.  Go to www.savethe1.com to learn about them (1 = the number one).

Raving Feminists

When the Feminist Movement was gathering attention in the early 1960s, they wanted to be equal to men in everything.  Everybody pretty much agreed that it was fair that men and women get paid the same for the same jobs.  But that was not all the feminists wanted: they wanted to be like men and have sex whenever they wanted with whomever they wanted without getting pregnant, just like men.  (Why, oh, why didn't they choose to imitate the many wonderful men who didn't act like alley cats!)  The Birth Control Pill took care of that, only problem was, the Pill had horrible side effects women wouldn't tell their doctors about, because then the doctors couldn't prescribe it and, no contraceptive pill or device is 100% effective: sometimes the WOMAN WOULD GET PREGNANT!  And then women wanted to kill the babies - their own babies - if they wanted. 

The feminists (and others who financially benefited from abortions) put forth the thought that a WOMAN HAS THE RIGHT TO CONTROL HER OWN BODY.  Not very many would disagree with that.  However, an unborn baby is in no way a part of his or her mother's body!!  Yes, the baby is temporarily dependent on his or her mother for warmth and nourishment.  Scientists even found out it is the BABY who controls when labor will begin, not the mother.

Imagine all the chaos and drama of those early years.  Some feminist groups actually had public 'bra burning' ceremonies!  What a comedy!!

One thing I've wondered about all these last 41 years but have not heard one comment about is: fully 50% of babies killed by abortion are FEMALE!  Shouldn't an honest-to-goodness feminist be true to her sisterhood and not allow females to be killed? The whole business is crazy!  And selfish!

Planned Barrenhood

The primary baby-killing organization in America calls itself "Planned Parenthood."  This was a new concept.  Before the advent of the Birth Control Pill in the early 1960s, society in general knew sex before marriage was WRONG.  Babies were desired as the fruit of married love.  Growing up, I remember hearing the neighborhood ladies talk about the one mother on our street who had only one child, "Poor Thing."  (Not that it is bad to have one child, I'm just mentioning the attitude at that time.)  The usual family had at least 4 children, sometimes 6 or 7.  Two families in my grade school had 13 children.  My grandfather was the youngest of 18!

My mom called us children, "The First Crop and the Second Crop."  Bob and I were separated by two years, then there was a 4-year gap, then Steve was born, in 2 years, along came Don.  This was Life in the '40s and '50s.

Planned Parenthood promotes abortions.  They locate many of their abortion mills in low-income neighborhoods.  They have fought against all education of the mothers and BLATANTLY LIE to them: "It's not a baby; it's just a blob of cells."  Planned Parenthood receives 1 billion dollars of tax money every year.  They also like to tout that they really work for "Reproductive Health."  The statistics show that very little of what they actually do relates to this, which includes pap smears, etc.

There's a book called "Unplanned," by a former Planned Parenthood director, Abby Johnson, that I've heard about and want to read.  In it, she exposes the underhanded tactics to get young women to undergo the baby-killing surgery.  Some of the women getting surgery were not even pregnant!  Now Abby Johnson is a fervent pro-life advocate; she said one day it occurred to her that what they were doing was actually KILLING BABIES!!

Birthright

Birthright is an organization that believes that every pregnant woman has the right to give birth, and every child has the right to be born.  It supports the women with baby clothes, supplies, furniture, and in other ways.  I saved a newspaper article about the Lexington, Kentucky, Birthright chapter's 41st anniversary banquet last November.  Celebrity actress Jennifer O'Neill was the main speaker.  She told those 355 people assembled, "I had an abortion at 22 years of age. . . I was already a mom of one child, engaged and excited to be pregnant.  However, the father of the child wanted me to get an abortion, and I felt coerced to do this," she said.

"At 38 years of age, O'Neill came to Jesus, when carrying her third child.  "I have experienced nine miscarriages, domestic violence, broke my back, and married several times - but it was the abortion that had the most devastating impact" (CrossRoads, November 17, 2013, p. 5).

Birthright occasionally has fun baby showers.  The pregnant mothers are there and are extremely appreciative.

Susan B. Anthony List

This group works strictly to promote pro-life legislators and legislation.  It's current project is the "Pain Capable Bill" passed by the House of Representatives and awaiting Senate.  It would prohibit abortions after 20 weeks (see below, Right to Life chapters).

Years ago there was a prominent New York City abortionist, Dr. Bernard Nathansan who was responsible for 60,000 babies killed by abortion!  He converted to being PRO-LIFE after he realized the unborn babies felt what must be excruciating pain.  He has since passed away.  May he rest in peace!

Life Action

This is a bold, brave group doing undercover investigation in abortion clinics.  The founder and president, Lila Rose, has recorded blatant lies showing, among other lies, that abortion providers cover up for sexually abused minors!

Silent No More

Their mission is to help heal the women who have had abortions.  These women tell of their terrible experiences and the aftermath which includes approximately 80% (yes, 80%) of women post-abortion abuse alcohol to help forget.  They reported that actress Kim Kardashian was planning on an abortion, saw one of their ads and changed her mind.

Congressional Pro-Life Caucas

Representative Chris Smith (Republican) started this group 32 years ago.  He reported that Planned Parenthood spends $540 million tax dollars for abortions every year in America, and that for every 149 abortions, Planned Parenthood refers for one adoption.  Representative Dan Lipinski (Democratic) was a member of the caucas with him.

Prolife Across America

These are the 'billboard people,' serving the cause since 1989.  Last year, this group sponsored over 6,500 billboards in 41 states. My money is really tight now that I'm retired, but I'm going to have to put a check in the mail for this group.

Other groups you may consider are Students for Life, Latinos for Life (new this year), and Priests for Life.

Right to Life chapters and National Right to Life

Right to Life chapters are very well organized, and do great work, I can tell you from first-hand experience, as you can see from reading my blogs this week.  The National Right to Life website is a wonderful resource.  Go to www.nrlc.org, then view the video on "The Pain Capable Unborn Child Protection Act."  This new legislation aims to protect pre-born babies at 20 weeks of age when there is no doubt they feel pain.  I think probably they feel pain as early as 8 weeks.  We Americans take great pride is protecting animals of every kind.  What about our human 'animals?'

This year's National Right to Life Convention will be close to us in Louisville, Kentucky this year, June 26-28.  This is a great opportunity for us!  Be a part!  Circle your calendar and come with me!

Central Kentucky Right to Life

I really intend to 'put my money where my mouth is,' meaning, DO what I advocate.  Last Sunday, the local Right to Life group had a rally at our Lexington-Fayette County courthouse.  It was very well done.  The Lord smiled on us with sunny weather as we sat and listened to some interesting, passionate speakers.  One physician told us about the forty-plus years of research and statistics on induced abortions. She said that there is a direct link between abortions and subsequent BREAST CANCER!  The more abortions a woman has, the greater chance she has for this dread disease to develop.  I don't remember all the statistics, but this is imbedded in my brain: if a woman has 3 abortions, she has an 86% chance of getting breast cancer!!

If you wanted to be counted on the Pro-Life side of this question of Protection for All Americans, read some, write some letters, go to an event.  Each and every one of us is needed to accomplish this legal protection!!

What good does it do to educate yourself on these issues?  YOU CAN SAVE LIVES!!  Once I was visiting a next door neighbor.  Right to Life was new and we were talking about it.  She was an evangelical Christian and so far had not heard of Right to Life. After we talked, she agreed with me 100% on life issues.  In walks one of her friends who stated she was going to get an abortion.  My neighbor and I gently discussed with her the facts about abortions.  The new mother-to-be changed her mind!  Later I saw the baby.  That is unbelievably gratifying!  YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE! 

Lord of heaven and earth, much work needs to be done to undo the evils against the lives you have given us, including our own.  Remind us that whatever we do, even if we think it is not significant, counts with you!!

On the Fence? #4

OK, we've spent 3 days on the critically important issue of Legal Protection for the Right to Life for every American, from Conception to a Natural Death.  Let's recap the discussion so far, and see where  we've been and where we're headed.

Day #1, Sunday: The Scope of the Problem, "God Weeps!"  Pre-born babies are killed by any method, at any stage of development. Abortion is more and more being used for 'birth' control, which it really is.  Upwards of 53 million babies have been killed by abortion in the United States of America alone during the last 41 years.  This lack of respect for and legal protection of a segment of society has led to the firm establishment of the Culture of Death.  Two American states have enacted so-called "Death with Dignity" laws which permit doctors to assist patients wanting to kill themselves.  This is called "The Slippery Slope." When one segment of a people is not protected, we all are in danger.

Day #2, Monday: Educating Ourselves on these Issues: "We Can Learn: We are sliding down The Slippery Slope."  Where will this lead?  Why should we be concerned?: Our Lives Depend on What We Do!

Day #3: Tuesday: Action: "To Stop the Culture of Death, We Can Act: "Contacting Your Legislators is the easiest way to Stand Up for Life!"  Why this is important and how you can do it.  A short history of Kentucky Sixth Congressional District Representatives.

Day #4: Parent Issues

Do you have a teenage daughter or son?  You undoubtedly know that if your minor son fathers a child you might have to pay child support until he reaches legal age. (Now with Genetic Testing, there is no escape for 'sperm donors.')  Did you know that your daughter could have an abortion, a major surgical procedure, WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT and WITHOUT YOUR KNOWLEDGE?  For your child to have even the most minor of medical procedures, ear- or body-piercing, you have to sign consent.  Consider: abortion not only kills the unborn baby, it harms the mother!  Abortion is the ONLY MEDICAL PROCEDURE DONE BLINDLY!  The abortionist cannot see where the vacuum catheter is reaching.  Many women have been rendered sterile and have had to have emergency hysterectomies as a result.  Some have died.

One of the erroneous opinions in 1973 when abortion was first legalized in America was that delivering the baby is far more dangerous that having an abortion.  WRONG!!!  Pregnancy is normal, pregnancy is not "a disease," taking the baby to delivery is better for the mother, no matter how young or old she is.  

Another bad opinion in 1973 was that if a girl is the victim of rape or incest, it's better to abort the baby to spare her the trauma of pregnancy and childbirth.  WRONG!!  Abortion is violent and very harmful. Also, no woman or girl has to raise a child she has given birth to; many, many couples are waiting to adopt!

What if the child aborted was your grandchild?  What if it would be your ONLY grandchild because the abortion procedure rendered your daughter sterile?  Could you live with it?  I personally know a woman who had an abortion years ago and encouraged her daughter to also have an abortion close to the same time!  She is filled with regret!  It is only through her strong faith in God - now - that she can begin to forgive herself.  There are some young women who are unmarried, pregnant, and want to carry their baby to term.  Sometimes the young women's mothers and/or fathers will not only offer to pay for an abortion but force the young woman to have an abortion!  It doesn't take much imagination to think of another scenario, when the young women's parents are old and burdensome: perhaps the woman would be able to relieve herself of her burden by her doctor's legal injection! (This is already happening in Belgium.)

What about the father of the aborted baby?  If a woman having unmarried sex finds herself pregnant, she will usually inform the father, hoping he will say, "That's great!  Let's get married as soon as we can!"  Of course, more often than not, the father will either offer to pay to have the baby killed or abandon the woman entirely.

Fathers in America have ZERO RIGHTS over the life of their own unborn baby!  The unborn baby is considered the mother's "property."  Is this morally right?  Years ago, right after the 1973 Supreme Court decision allowing abortion-on-demand, I had a repairman come to my home.  We got around to talking about the decision.  He said, "My first wife aborted our baby herself.  I asked her why she did it.  She said she wanted to see what it looked like.  I divorced her.  I didn't want to be a party to that."  Many, many fathers are caring and responsible.

All these issues are additional 'complications' of legal abortions.  They are hidden, unseen. But the pain borne by every baby killed inside his or mother is felt not only by the baby, not only by the mother, but by the father, everyone involved in it, and all those who look the other way and tolerate it.

Our Lord, we pray today that you will continue to give us strength and power to fight all anti-life evils.  Please give us the words to speak and to write and to e-mail.  Please get us up early to vote if that's what we must do to vote; direct our votes to those who would support our most basic right, the Right to Life.  We thank you and we love you, as you love us!

Tomorrow we will consider how to use our time, our talents, and our resources to help protect all Human Life.

On the Fence? #3

To Stop the Culture of Death, We Can Act: CONTACTING YOUR LEGISLATORS is the easiest way to STAND UP FOR LIFE!!  Other than your personal prayers, it is the most effective way to put the pressure on those who make the laws.

Haven't all our legislators heard these same arguments against baby-killing over and over for the last 40 years?  Are things really different now?  Actually, yes.  In 1973, the Supreme Court judges declared they didn't know when 'life' begun; there was a lot of talk about "viability" - when a pre-born baby could live on his or her own if born premature. What was meant was when could they 'breathe' on their own, because newborn humans could NOT live on their own!  Then, perhaps, they might need to be protected by law.  Meanwhile, with the development of medical advances such as ultrasound procedures, more sophisticated genetic testing, and more effective surgery in utero, everyone admitted that, yes, human life begins at conception. And then, their hearts changed and said, "SO WHAT?"  The killing continued even more.

In 1973, the law was supposedly made for rare cases in which the life of a mother may be threatened.  Now, abortion is truly used as 'birth control.'  FYI: In 1925 in New York City, Margaret Sanger and her colleagues proposed a broad system of birth control and sterilization to combat the "black" and "yellow" peril.  How wildly has she succeeded!: In New York City, with a steady 41% of all pregnancies ended by direct abortion, the rate for blacks is around 60% to over 70%.  In my view, this is genocide!  Why not are the African-Americans ALL campaigning to stop this slaughter!!

With the past 40 years' experience of legal abortion, we know that now 47% of American women of child-bearing age have aborted at least one of their unborn babies!  What a immense amount of grieving!  In the Bible, Rachel wept because her children 'were no more.'  Yes, the Culture of Death in America is definitely on the rise.  The last figure I remember for the total number of babies killed by abortion in America alone in the last 41 years is 53 million!

We in the Kentucky Sixth District are blessed with Pro-Life Senators and a Pro-Life Congressional Representative.  It was not always this way!  Let me tell you of how it may have begun.

Although groups concerned with legal protection for all American citizens were active since 1968, the National Right to Life Committee was officially incorporated in May, 1973.  Dr. John Willke, a Cincinnati physician, was the President.  Since its inception in 1976, I was a member of Right to Life of Danville and later on the board of Kentucky Right to Life.  At that time, Kentucky's Sixth Congressional District stretched from south of Lexington/central Kentucky and north clear to the Ohio River/Covington area.

Our Kentucky Sixth District Congressman was John Breckinridge, who in his 3rd term in 1977 had a 100% Pro-Death Voting Record.  I was determined to meet with him, in person, and ask him about this.  In the summer of 1977, he was coming to the Boyle County Courthouse in Danville to talk with interested citizens.  I was a bit nervous about seeing such an important person until I remember what my dear grandfather, Rob, used to say when us kids would be impressed with some or another popular, important person, "Well, does he put his pants on one leg at a time?"  (Grandpa Rob had a 2nd grade education.)

Everyone I knew discouraged me from even trying to change Mr. Breckinridge's mind.  They said, "He is unbeatable."  "Kentucky is and has been solid Democratic for over a hundred years.  The 6th district has elected Democratic Congressmen for all of that time with exception of one 2-year period."  "Breckinridge is a really BIG SHOT in State Government."  But the more I thought about it: I'd never know unless I tried!

It seemed like a good idea to bring along my 8-month-old baby, daughter #6, Patty.  We went to the courthouse on a Saturday morning and finally Mr. Breckinridge and several of his staff came.  There was a group of about 30 people, all 'old' except for me and Patty.  The staff asked each of us individually what we wanted to talk with the congressman about.  Everyone else had mentioned various problems with their Social Security but I said, "Life Issues."

Patty and I had to wait several hours while Mr. Breckinridge talked with the others, one by one.  They called us last.  I prayed Patty would behave and she was perfect!  Mr. Breckinridge sat on one side of a desk and I sat down opposite him.  I sat Patty on the desk between us, on one side.

Mr. Breckinridge said, "Hello."

I replied, "Hello.  Mr. Breckinridge.  You vote to kill babies just like this one."

He leaned over and nearly whispered, "I have to."

I looked him in the eyes and firmly stated, "Then I will do everything I can to see that you are not elected again.  Thank you."  I picked up Patty and left.

Several months later our Right to Life of Danville group decided we would invite the candidates for the 6th District to talk to us about their positions on various issues.  We arranged to meet at the local business school.  Mr. Larry Hopkins, a Lexington attorney, came and spoke about many concerns and said that he was "Pro-Life."  In his previous ads, however, I felt he came across as 'tentative', like he was testing the waters of public opinion, and didn't want his opinion known widely.

Mr. Hopkins asked me privately, "How Pro-Life is the 6th District?"  That got me excited!  I told him, "The 6th District is the Most Pro-Life District in the State of Kentucky!  In Covington, we have an extremely active Right to Life chapter.  Covington is across the river from Cincinnati.  That's where the National Right to Life group started!!  We are Pro-Life!!"  He thanked me and left.

After that I noticed that Mr. Hopkins' ads had changed to vigorously emphasize that he was pro-life!  No mistake about it!  While our Right to Life chapter could not say, "Vote for Larry Hopkins," we could say, "Don't forget to register to vote.  Learn where your candidates stand on Life Issues.  Vote Pro-Life!"

In the primary election in May, Mr. Breckinridge was defeated by democratic candidate, Tom Easterly.  Mr. Breckinridge died one year later.  May his soul rest in peace!

Larry Hopkins, a Republican, defeated Tom Easterly in the November, 1978, general election!!!   Mr. Hopkins served us well from 1979 to 1993, voting 100% pro-life.  Since then, we seem to alternate with Pro-Death Democratic representatives and Pro-Life Republican representatives.

Particularly disturbing to me was the term of Ben Chandler. He served from 2004 till last year, 2013. I would write him letters about my views on various issues but on 'Life' issues, he was intractable, and on the edge of being nasty.  Similar to Mr. Breckinridge, Mr. Chandler came from a family history of service in Kentucky government which included Governor Happy Chandler.  Mr. Ben Chandler also figured he was 'unbeatable!'

Last year, Andy Barr, a Pro-Life Republican candidate, opposed Ben Chandler. I was still working so I couldn't do much but I had to do something to help him.  I went door-to-door in my own precinct with my  #2 son, John.  The precinct is large and it took us fully three Sunday afternoons to reach everyone but we did!  We either talked with or left literature on the front door handles.  Only two people spoke very 'passionately' for the opposition.  That surprised me; I thought we'd have a lot of potential verbal fights.  Again, I don't know what good we did, but Andy Barr carried my precinct and is doing a great job in Congress.

These two examples are just two ways of contacting or helping your representatives and candidates.  If you visit Washington, D.C., you could also make an appointment and go to see them there.  Wouldn't that be fun!  I hope to do that this summer!

The fastest, easiest way to make your views known is to write a letter.  E-mails are very quick!  Snail-mail is also good.  They say that members of Congress actually get, in comparison to the number of people they serve, few letters!  So, YOUR LETTER WILL BE VERY IMPORTANT!  It is suggested that if you have multiple issues to address, send a separate note for each issue.  You will ALWAYS get a response.  It will take several weeks.

Our local Lexington, Kentucky, USA, Congressman and their addresses are:
1) Senator Mitch McConnell: e-mail: www.mcconnell.senate.gov, 317 Russell Senate Office Building, Washington, D.C. 20510

2) Senator Rand Paul: e-mail: www.paul.senate.gov, 124 Russell Senate Office Building,
Washington, D.C. 20510

3) Congressman Andy Barr: e-mail: www.barr.house.gov, 1432 Longworth House Office Building,
Washington, D.C. 20515.

An idea just popped into my mind: let's copy this information and put it out at home where we can see it.  Check out these or find your own particular government officials, also on the State level.  Don't complain if you don't make your voice heard!  (I know you're registered to vote!!)

Dear Lord, please get us out of our comfort zone and get us DOING WHATEVER WE CAN to protect the beautiful lives you have given to us.  Give us the energy, give us the thoughts, if we need stamps, remind us to buy them.  We want to do this for you, Lord, and for ourselves!!

On the Fence? #2

We Can Learn: WE ARE SLIDING DOWN THE SLIPPERY SLOPE!:  While The Culture of Life holds that human life is precious, a gift of God, to be protected in every way from the moment of conception to a natural death, The CULTURE OF DEATH believes that human life is valuable only if it is useful to others; otherwise, it can and should be killed.

No one can sit on the fence of indecision any longer, in nearly any place in this world of ours! Either you are pro-life and work in every way you can or you are pro-death and work in every way you can to promote death.  The big problem with being pro-death is that eventually, YOU will be the victim of an untimely death.

There was a chilling commercial on TV last week: A wrinkled old woman was lying on a gurney.  Visions of the abortion she had as a young woman was running through her mind.  She remembered saying, "I can't support a baby."  In the next room, two young adults, male and female were talking, "We can't afford to take care of your mother."  Mother was now ready for the legal, lethal injection.  You?  Me?

Think it couldn't happen in America?  Since 2002, people close to 65 years of age have been leaving the country of Belgium because their children could and DO have them put to death.  "In 2002, when euthanasia was legalized, it was said that it would only be performed in very rare circumstances. . .However, 10 years and 8,000 deaths later, these rules are being ignored and euthanasia is out of control. . .In fact, Distelmans gave my own mother a lethal injection on April 19, 2012 - because she had chronic depression." (from the Montreal Gazette - December 5, 2013).

Our American State of Oregon started implementing its 1994 "Death with Dignity" law in 1997.  This makes voluntary euthanasia and physician-assisted suicide legal.  Our State of Washington has a similar law on its books.  Soon to follow will be the State of Montana.  Whatever happened to our belief in "God gives life and God takes life, in his own time?"  How many and how quickly will more states follow on the ultra-liberal Death Wagon?

As a former psychiatric nurse, I can tell you that even the deepest, darkest cases of depression can be helped. One of my patients had been severely depressed for over 40 years.  With medication and counseling, we were actually able to cure him!  It was so wonderful to see him start to enjoy life again; it was truly like he was born again.  This patient was not the exception - depression is the most curable of the psychiatric conditions.

As a former nursing home and hospital nurse, I can tell you that your pain can usually be totally eliminated or greatly reduced.  Ask your physician, if you don't believe me.  The main reason folks think about ending their life or the life of a suffering loved one, is PAIN. It can and will be relieved.  Count on it.

Please educate yourself thoroughly on these issues. There are so many facets, so many misrepresentations and outright lies.  Several years ago I knew a young professional woman pregnant with her first child.  She was very happy about this.  Suddenly she was no longer pregnant.  She found out, from an ultrasound that her child 'might' be handicapped.  She said she did not want to deal with a handicapped child so she had the baby aborted.  FYI: these pre-natal tests are not 100% reliable.  Sometimes they even report the wrong sex of the baby!  What if she aborted a normal baby?  What if she became sterile as a result of the induced abortion?  What about the couple who would love to adopt her handicapped child?

There are two DVDs I'd like to recommend to you:
1) "Demographic Winter: the decline of the human family" and
2) "Demographic Bomb: demography is destiny."
These were produced in 1992 and are even more pertinent today.  You may preview them at www.DemographicWinter.com.  They concern the results of the Culture of Death worldwide.

Yesterday, I mentioned the Decline of the Roman Empire.  It is not far-fetched to envision a future telling about the Decline of the American Country.  Think about who has 1.351 billion citizens? China.  That nation has 40 million more men than women, due to their one-child policy.  If a Chinese family can only have one baby, they prefer males who traditionally support parents in their old age.  What would and could that godless Communist nation do with all those extra men?  It takes little imagination to foretell a coming war!

In 1965, Pulitzer-prize winning author, John Hersey, wrote a novel called "White Lotus."  It concerns what happened after China wins the Third World War.  It is not pretty.  But we Americans would do well to read it and take it to heart.  After I read "White Lotus," I vowed to learn how to speak and write Chinese!

So we are living dangerously, tolerating universal abortion-on-demand, beginning to see the euthanasia death wagon gathering speed, down the slippery slope of the Culture of Death.  In 2014, are we going to put the brakes on?  Tomorrow I'll give suggestions on what we can do.  YOUR LIFE depends on what you do!

Oh, Lord, we pray that you help us stop the evils against Life, help us stop the baby-killing, help us stop the elder-killing.  We know you shed your grace on our great country, America.  Please give us the strength we need!

On the Fence?

God Weeps!  And, we should, too.  We live in a world increasingly more barbaric, year by year.  We look the other way and never flinch at the knowledge of a long list of government-sanctioned evils and imagine it won't ever touch us, but, oh, it does.

The very fact that we in an America - you, me, all of us - have tolerated the raw, shocking, direct, deliberate killing of our most helpless and entirely innocent babies yet unborn stains us permanently  as a people no less demonic than past societies that sacrificed humans to unknown gods.  Actually, we are worse!  They had excuses - appeasing angry gods in the hopes that their weather would be good enough to raise their crops or that their enemies wouldn't slaughter them.  What are our excuses?  That conception control is too much trouble?  That having a baby would be too much bother, a threat to our self-indulgence, our 'convenience?'  That, well, I'd never have an abortion myself but if you think you might need to, I'll look the other way?  That I thought you'd marry me for sure if I got pregnant and you won't so I don't want to raise this baby by myself?  That if I carried this baby and gave him or her up for adoption, everyone would know I had been pregnant but if it's aborted, no one will ever know?  That the doctor told me the baby might be handicapped?  That my mother said she'd give me the money for an abortion but I'd have to leave home if I let the baby be born?  That I need to finish high school or college first and I won't let this baby stop me!?  That I'd vote Pro-Life but it's really only one of many important issues?

How many times have we heard, over the years, that those who don't learn the lessons of history are condemned to repeat the same horrors?  When, exactly, does a society fail?  When does a country get so weak that others feel strong enough to invade?  Learn from the Fall of the Roman Empire: from the heights of conquering 'the world,' they became increasingly rich and powerful but they couldn't persist in the hard work and discipline, then the Romans found themselves more concerned with self-indulgence, immoral, hedonistic lifestyles, including abortion.  In effect, their society imploded, got weak from the inside.  They simply lost the will to defend themselves.  The northern barbarians were only too happy to invade, kill them off and walk off with whatever and whomever they wanted.  Will that be the way of 21st century America?

Most of you reading this blog don't remember the day that the United States Supreme Court struck down all the state laws prohibiting abortion.  It was January 22, 1973.  We all knew for months that the court would consider this decision. I sincerely thought this would never happen in America, the Land of the Free where we had the Right to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. Their decision took me by surprise.  I remember crying and crying over this, I was in such shock. I was not a child; I was nearly 30 years old.

The Supreme Court's explanation of their decision muttered on about they didn't know when 'life' began, they didn't want to interfere with a woman's Constitutional Right to Privacy, as found in the 14th amendment.  Google and read this amendment.  The word 'privacy' is not there; I couldn't find anything that remotely would sound like this topic.  Even 40 years ago, these reasons were outrageous!  We all knew that when a woman was pregnant, she would have a baby, not a puppy, not a plant, nothing else but a baby. And when could life start but at the beginning, at conception?  Only a moron or a fool would think otherwise!!

Thus began the Culture of Death in America.  Newly-formed Right to Life groups warned us about the "slippery slope:" once a nation, like they did in Nazi Germany, decided that one group is not worthy to live, every one is in danger of legal killing.  Legalized abortions were already happening in Europe before 1973.

So what did I personally do?  In 1976 my little church in Danville showed a movie on what we look like when we are unborn, in the various stages of development.  It was the most profound, beautiful movie I had ever seen. Before a woman knows she is pregnant, the baby's heart is beating, at 18 days of age.  At 43 days of age, our brains are coordinating all our movements.  When we are 9 weeks old inside our mother's womb, we have permanent, individual fingerprints. At 10 weeks, the sense of touch is intact, feeling comfort and pain.  After the movie, several of us agreed that having legal killing of unborn babies was terribly wrong and we would see if anyone was interested in fighting this evil by forming a local Right to Life chapter.

With about a half-dozen of us, more or less, I worked at this (volunteer, of course) from 1976 to 1980.  We eventually created a monthly Newsletter which reached 500 or so. A stay-at-home mom at the time, I was responsible for writing the newsletter.  I read everything I could get my hands on that related to Life issues.  It was heart-stopping!  What went on then in the abortion mills, both in America and in Europe, was worse that the worst horror movie you've ever heard of.  I won't recount this but just know that 'anything goes' in a place that will kill your baby, it cares nothing for you, just wants your money. The same filth, inhumanity, irresponsibility goes on today.

Today, my topic concerned Awareness of the Problem.  In the next several days, I plan to address Learning about the issue, and then about the ways we - every single one of us - could Act to stop this Evil.  Please hear me out, please don't sweep this Life Issue under the rug of your conscience.  Your Life Depends on what YOU will do!

Oh, Lord of All, we pray for the heart to know how to STOP THE CULTURE OF DEATH in our beloved United States of America!  We pray for the strength to carry out each and every activity to promote Life!  We know you will guide us and help us!

An Easy Lesson

Bob Goff is a very interesting guy: lawyer, ambassador to Uganda, husband, father, a man of many interests with many friends.  I'm nearly finished with his book, "Love Does: Discover a Secretly Incredible Life in an Ordinary World," (Thomas Nelson press, 2012).  This book has been so easy and enjoyable to read, I highly recommend it.  Bob learned very early in life that if you love someone, you need to act, you need to do lots of things for them.  Love doesn't just admire, feel joy or receive pleasure, Love Acts: simple but profound!

How a Bar of Soap Changed My Life

I pride myself on being a practical and thrifty person. I would like to live a simple life with fewer things to have to store, dust off, and think about.  Yet I try to appreciate the beauty in most everything, especially in people.  Like anyone else, I like novelty.  That's what enticed my old friend, Pat, and I, to venture into a unique store in Stanford, Kentucky (USA), when I was visiting her last Friday. (Please see this blog, Friday, January 10, 2013: "Hanging Fork Creek and Deer Tracks."

To step into the store of Kentucky Soaps & Such, 203 Main Street, Stanford, Kentucky, is to step back in time.  From the creaky wooden floor (anyone remember Woolworth's old wooden floors back in the day?) to the  imprinted dark tin ceiling, it is NOT 2013, more like 1913!  We actually had a long chat about the benefits of soaps and body creams made with all natural ingredients with the woman who made their products "in the basement here."

My old nurse hands are as dry as a sagebrush bush in a drought!  We were told that the oatmeal soaps and creams are particularly effective with dry skin.  And the attractive young woman told us that her soaps and creams have zero preservatives or other chemicals.  I had entered the store with the thought, "This is really nice but I have no intention of buying anything."

Pat and I meandered through the store, found other bath products, pottery, Kentucky coffee and food.  The "highly moisturizing" (that definitely caught my attention!) bar soap is made with fresh goat's milk as the main ingredient.  We were invited to try the Sugar Scrub, 'a gentle exfoliant,' on our hands in the back of the store in their old-fashioned sink.  Pat did so, liked the feel on her skin, so I tried it and also enjoyed the feel on my hands.

In the back of the store are some children's clothes and toys, including some unique cloth 'paper dolls.'  We wandered around some more and selected several items to buy.  I had to buy some of the oatmeal soap and cream.  I've been using these things for a week and am very pleased with the result:   my hands don't look 'flaky' and cracked, and I don't have to lop vaseline and cotton gloves overnight any more.  They really feel better!  Coming from a nurse who had to 'gel' my hands with antiseptic gel a hundred times a day,  this means a lot!

While I knew that it couldn't possibly be healthy to put 'all those chemical ingredients' into and onto my body, I never had time to think about this seriously.  I'm going to try to eliminate more and more of artificial food and cleaning products.

This company, "Kentucky Soaps & Such," sells their products somewhere in Lexington. I'll have to find out where so I can continue to use my beloved oatmeal soap.  An alternative is going online  (www.kentuckysoapsandsuch.com) - they say they ship anywhere.

Pat really is an 'old' friend.  I admired her before I even met her in 1969 when we moved across the street from her in Danville, Kentucky.  My husband put up the rural-type mailbox in front of her house on a blisteringly hot summer day.  Pat came out and gave him some lemonade.  Both in our twenties, in 1969, between us, Pat and I had seven children, close to the same ages.  It was wonderful having them grow up together!

It was so fun not only last week but throughout the years of our friendship going on various little mini-trips.  We spent uncounted hours on Pat's super-wide porch swing solving the problems of our families, our neighborhood, and the universe!  Vow to spend time - in person, if you can - with your favorite people!

I praise you and thank you, O Lord, for the love and friendship of my old friend, Pat!  I know that this mirrors your love for us all!

The People Warehouse

After my Mom, Adeline, suddenly died (age 82) of a massive cerebral hemorrhage in 2002 in San Antonio, Texas (USA), my brothers and I asked, then begged our Dad, Reuben, (age 87) to come live with one of us.  He adamantly refused, "I have to be near my doctors!"  The next year dad fell and broke his hip; he was also diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease.  Instead of entering the nursing home for rehabilitation and then going home, he was to live there, until he died, six months later.

Dad's nursing home, as far as decor was concerned, was magnificent, as good as a fine hotel.  The care was worse than horrible.  Dad was tied to his bed, except for meals. I inquired about this with the nursing home staff, telling them, "We don't do that in Kentucky.  I work in a nursing home.  There are other ways to keep a resident safe."  I was told, "Well, we do it here."  I begged dad to let me bring him back to Kentucky.  Again, he refused.

In that year, 2003, I felt that the nursing homes I had worked in and did work in, were trying to give excellent care.  Yes, there were lapses, there were accidents, but most of us tried very hard to treat our residents like family.

This morning I was talking with a friend, Angie, who was extremely upset with the care her mother, a patient with Alzheimer's disease, was currently receiving in a nursing home here in Lexington, Kentucky.  While visiting her mother recently, Angie witnessed a resident fall in the hall next to a nurse giving medications.  Angie thought that surely the nurse would attend to the fallen resident.  Angie was on her way to do an errand for her mother.  In 15 minutes, Angie came back to her mother's room.  The fallen resident was still on the floor, right next to the nurse who continued to give meds.  Angie told her, "I can't believe this lady is still on the floor.  Can't you stop to give her help?"  The nurse had no answer.  However, now Angie is taking photos with her phone of grossly bad care as proof, should she need it.  (The administrator of the home advised her she could not photograph any one other than her own mother.)

Several weeks ago, another friend was in a different nursing home here in Lexington for rehab.  This, also, was a large, extremely fine-looking, clean nursing home.  But my friend thought she received poor care.  She said that no one would answer her call light in the night - ever!  I could go on and on about the many instances of failure to give care.

I unofficially conclude that care in the local nursing homes has significantly deteriorated!  Ten years ago, we really tried our best.  Now, it appears, a pretense is not even made.

If you have a loved one who must spend time in a nursing home, I would suggest that you keep close watch on the care given. Visit daily.  Ask questions and get answers. There are state ombudsmen you can address 'issues' with, if you don't get good care after talking with the administrators. If you or a loved one need rehabilitation in a nursing home, the one thing that may save your life or theirs is this: know that the therapists, by law, can not treat a resident who refuses therapy after three times.

So what happens?  Momma or daddy figures out quickly that therapy involves pain. This is unavoidable.  If enough medication is given to prevent pain while moving, the patient will be mostly unable to do the exercises needed. Then what?  Momma or daddy never receives and participates in the therapy that will get them able to do self-care and go home.  They will be nursing home residents until they die.

I have witnessed this many times over.  Momma or daddy are tired and weak and just stay in bed.  They will die much sooner now!

Is there hope for leaving the nursing home after therapy?  During the eight years I worked in nursing home, with dozens and dozens of patients coming in for rehab, only TWO participated in the therapy and went home.  Why were these two different: family involvement every day, for every therapy treatment.  The family members came and 'highly encouraged' their mothers to do the therapy - almost to the point of bullying!  And the patients went home!  The two patients were grateful for all the encouragement.

To end this, here's a true story about a visit daughter, #7, Marie, and I had one day with Daddy.  By this time, Daddy thought I was my mother and Marie was me.  Daddy kept asking, "What time is it?"  I kept answering, "Daddy, there's a clock built into your side-rail.  It's ---."  After five or six times of the same exchange, it occurred to me, "The clock is digital.  He probably doesn't even think it's a clock."  Then I took my watch off my wrist and put it on Daddy's wrist.  I showed him, "Look, if you push the little button, it lights up."  Daddy pushed it and smiled. He pulled the blankets over his head.  We heard lots of giggling. Daddy must have been playing with the watch!  We left Daddy very happy!

Let's ask God, please help us value all our sick, especially our elders, especially those with dementia.  Let us ensure they get the care and dignity they deserve.  Let us remember your words, "Whatever you do to the least of my brethren . . ."

The Dreaded "C" Word

Cancer: there, I've said it!  A diagnosis of cancer of any type used to be a death sentence.  Great progress has been made in curing many kinds of cancers.  The keys to curing any cancer are: 1) knowing what the common warning signs are, 2) getting evaluated by a competent physician as soon as you suspect 'something' - never ignore warning signs, they won't go away! and 3) following the medical treatment.  Doing this will not assure you of a cure, it will give you a better chance.

Cancer must be present in nearly every family in America.  Some are caused by life-styles.  My brother, Steve, smoked up until the day of his official 'leukemia' (blood cancer) diagnosis.  I later found out he had ignored warning signs for months.  My aunt also ignored a warning sign: she lost a lot of weight without trying.  We told her, "That's not right.  You need to see a doctor."  But she waited till she had severe abdominal pain - and died nine months later.  My friend, Margaret, also ignored the warning sign of a continuous 'period.'  She, also, didn't get it checked out for many months until it was painful.  Her funeral was one of the most painful in my life.  When it was over, I just went to my car and cried for a long time.

It's important that we know the medical history of our blood relatives.  Many different diseases run in families.  If several in the family had the same type of cancer, it should be a 'red flag' for us to get our doctors to pay particular attention in this area for prevention and monitoring.

This is not a medical blog, even though I spent a semester in nursing school on a hospital cancer's unit, that in no way qualifies me to give any sort of medical advice except to repeat: don't ignore warning signs.

Since this blog is concerned with relationships, it is likely that someone you know will have cancer and you will want to help the person cope. It is not easy to help a sick person.  Most cancer patients will need lots of support.  But, isn't that what friends are for?  The patient may not feel like eating or talking, but we can be there for them, we can take them to medical appointments, we can shop for them.

Finding out about cancer in general and also about the particular type of cancer your loved one has will help you both.  It's impossible to estimate how long someone will live after learning they have cancer but they probably will live longer if they have a positive attitude.  At least it will make what time they have, more pleasant.  Steve had the best attitude of anyone I know: "I'm going to beat this.  This is just a small stop on my highway of life."  While Steve didn't want visitors, we sent him comedy movies.  Laughing, it turns out, helps cancer patients.

I pray that we will be able to help those who need help and that when we need help, we will ask for it and accept it graciously.

The Blockhead

Situation:  Time and time again, since he was a very young boy, Chip wouldn't listen to anyone. "Chip, his mother hollered, "I told you to stay away from him.  Why oh why did you hang out with that loser?  He stole hubcaps last week.  If you're with him when he gets caught, you'll get in trouble, too!"  It happened and Chip got a suspended sentence since it was his first offense.

Then he grew up and had serious problems.  "Don't marry her, she's bad news, Chip, I've seen her out with two other men since you've been engaged."  Chip didn't listen and married his first girlfriend anyway.  Several months later, Chip caught her cheating on him in their own home.  So they divorced.

Decision after decision, Chip's friends and family would see disaster in the foreground of his life and tried to warn him.  "Chip, don't give her money.  She'll just blow it on drugs, the way she always does.  And she might get you hooked, too."  Chip lost thousands of dollars on that girlfriend.

Chip always went for the exciting women with flashy, immodest clothes and great figures.  One girlfriend told Chip she really needed money for emergency dental work. Chip gave her quite a lot of cash.  Instead, she spent it on fake boobs.  Chip was actually embarrassed with the results.

"Chip, why is a hard-working guy like you thinking about letting her live with you?  She can't hold a job for three weeks.  Are you sure you even want to think of going out with her?  She is just playing you for a meal ticket."  Chip didn't listen.  This woman soon got pregnant and tried to bully Chip into marrying her.  He wouldn't marry her but supports the child and kicked the girlfriend out.  His friends tell him, "Chip, why don't you at least get a paternity test?  You don't even know if the child is yours."  Chip can't quite bring himself to do it.  Occasionally the woman tries to sweet-talk, then bully Chip into marriage but first, she wants Chip to put her name on the deed to his house.  Praise the Lord, he won't do it!

One time Chip asked his best friend, "Why do I have to learn everything the hard way?  Is, perhaps, after all these years - Chip is now in his mid-forties - Chip getting at least a small insight into his behavior?

Lessons learned:  It's very hard to watch a good friend or close family member self-destruct, especially if it is repetitive.  It doesn't take long to find out that the very person who always asks you for advice and never takes it,  just wants to vent, just wants an audience.  I'm not sure if it is kinder just to listen and know it won't matter or to be confrontational and say, "Look, I feel like no matter what I say, you're going to do _______ anyway, so I'm not going to give you my thoughts on this."

What about us?  Could we be considered "blockheads?" Perhaps we're not on the wild side like Chip, but do we do things we know are wrong over and over, year after year?  Our God is patient with us, never ties us up and tells us we're stupid, gently reminds us so that we know for sure certain actions are wrong.  Are we like St. Augustine was, when he was young and wild: "God, I want to be good, but not just yet!"  How do we know we'll be here tomorrow so we can repent?

Outcome:  Chip has, for the moment, sworn off women.  He says he's been burned too much, he just won't date at all.  We'll see how long his resolution lasts.  He seems to spend all his energies on the child. That is not a bad thing!

Oh, Lord, we pray, please continue to be patient with us but please keep pointing out our mistakes and sins.  Please give us the strength to 'be good - now!'

Divorce Causes, #1: FACEBOOK!

Different sources place the number of United States of America Divorces caused by "Facebook" from 20% to 30% to 50%!!  This is most disturbing, especially since Facebook has only existed since 2004.  What is happening here?

Apparently there is a lot of "online cheating" facilitated by Facebook.  Maybe those unhappy in their relationships 'look' for others there, find others there, and then connect, in person. Also, many mean, horrible comments are posted on Facebook, by those trying to 'get back' at another.

You know what they say, "Play with fire and you WILL GET BURNED!!  Online 'flirting' by those in committed relationships is even more dangerous, sinister, and positively evil than in-person flirting because: 1) the Instant Nature of this type of communication: you hit that 'enter' key and the whole world knows what's going on in your life, 2) the Impersonal Nature of Facebook: regardless of the name, you are NOT face-to-face, all sorts of misrepresentation - lying - can and does go on, and 3) the Consequences of this flirting risk are just as bad as any cheating: ripped-apart families, fatherless or motherless children, poverty, PURE PAIN!!! 

In the past year, I have personally witnessed this online disaster happen to a family near and dear to me. It was excruciating for the entire family.  One person's online lies led to a disaster which could not be reversed.

We can't 'blame' Facebook.  It is just another vehicle for good or evil. It's fun and interesting to check out what your friends and family are doing.  Fortunately, it can be limited to our own circle.  It's the young people, mostly, we have to protect and inform: don't 'friend' everyone!!

Lord God, please give us the wisdom to use all you have given us only for good!

Fishers, #3: The Ultimate

Today, Sunday, the Lord's Day, is my day of church attendance, peace, thinking holy thoughts, and just plain resting.  If God can rest on the seventh day after the work of creating the universe, I can also rest one day per week.  Sad to say, I only could begin this after I retired from nursing last June.  So now I can particularly and purposely enjoy a day of blissful rest.

As a baby, I was baptized a Catholic Christian, what they call a "cradle Catholic."  Now whether you're a Catholic Christian or not, you probably have your opinion of people who have been Catholic their whole lives. There are so many misconceptions, it is somewhat ludicrous. Now, I don't want to put anyone down, I don't doubt their sincerity, but I've been asked some un-intelligent questions over the years. 1) Does the pope eat babies?  2) Do you believe in Jesus?  3) Why don't you Catholics believe in the Bible?  4) It says in the Bible that you can't add anything, why did you Catholics add books to the Bible? 5) Does the Pope tell you how to vote?  plus the general misconception that all Catholics drink hard liquor and most are alcoholics.  The answers to #1 & #5, are 'no,' for the record.

2: Yes, I believe that Jesus is God, the second person of the Blessed Trinity of God the Father, God the Son (Jesus), and God the Holy Spirit.

3 & 4: I attended a Catholic girls high school in Louisville, Holy Rosary Academy.  Our religion teachers were priests.  We studied the Bible our whole junior year.  One really important thing about the Christian Bible: the Bible is the story of the formation of the Catholic Church; it was NOT handed down like God handed Moses the Ten Commandments.  It was developed from divinely-inspired writers.  The Catholic Church chose the New Testament books of the Bible from the writings of the time. The Catholic Church accepted the Old Testament books of the Bible to include all those the Jewish people used in the time before Jesus.  During the so-called 'Reformation' when Martin Luther, a Catholic priest, wanted to reform the church but didn't have the patience to wait for it, certain of the 'protesters/Protestants' took several books away from the Bible because they didn't like their messages.  The Catholic Church did not change the Bible.

One thing about the Catholic 'services' we call the Mass: my Catholic friends who converted from another religion or no religion say that they were so surprised, even shocked, to find out that the Mass is straight out of the Bible!  In a 3-year cycle of Bible reading, in our Masses, all of the Bible will have been read.  Many of us are in weekly Bible study groups.

I have enjoyed a slow and steady belief in and relationship with Jesus, the Saints and Angels my whole life with exception of two years when I was 18 to 20.  I questioned just who this Jesus was.  I thought it was too much that God would be human.  I thought I might convert to be a Jew.  But all the time I was questioning, I continued to go to church and the sacraments faithfully.  I thought, "What if it turns out to be true that Jesus is God?"  I prayed and came to believe, through the grace of God, that Jesus is indeed God, who loves us so much he died for us and rose from the dead for us.

I'm not mentioning this to try to convert anyone to be either a Christian or a Catholic Christian - that's up to you - I'm just offering my Sunday thoughts. The past year in the church was special, "The Year of Evangelization."  What that means is that, first, we are supposed to examine our own beliefs.  Second, we are supposed to do more than believe, we are supposed to ACT on those beliefs, in whatever way we feel God is leading us.  Our ultimate act would be to lead others to the belief in Jesus, in effect, to be what he called his first Twelve Apostles to do, to be Fishers of Men!

What have I gained from this lifetime of 'Catholic-ness?'  A life of JOY!  I don't mean pleasure, I don't mean total, never-ending happiness, I mean The Joy I have knowing I'm doing my best with what God gave me, to try to do what I think Jesus wants me to be and do.  And it's OK if I miss the mark sometimes, he knows I'll pick myself up and start again, with His help.  I look forward to being with Him and my friends and family and those who are already there in heaven, to the JOY that never ends!  That's all I can offer - JOY!

Saying "NO" #1: The First Time

Much of the hurt in our lives and in the lives of those we know and love, involves saying "yes" to things that we know are wrong and will hurt us: illegal drugs, too much alcohol, pornography, lust, adultery, fornication, any kind of cheating, addictions which, in themselves (such as computer games) are not harmful.  Many times, we think just a 'little bit' of this or that will be OK, that we'll be able to quit at any time.  But life doesn't work like that.

Adolescents - no matter how many calendar years they may have accumulated - likely may want to try things their peers are doing, knowing full well it might hurt them.  The mature person, even if he or she is a teenager, will know about certain evils and vow to ALWAYS say 'NO!', the first time and all other times, no matter how many times they are tempted.

We need to take this to heart, "Not all who start with small sins end up in hell, but all who end up in hell start with small sins" (The Snakebite Letters, Peter Kreeft, Ignatius Press, 1993, p. 42).  I highly recommend this book.  It is a modern remake of C.S. Lewis' The Screwtape Letters.  In The Snakebite Letters, a Senior Devil is instructing a young devil on how to corrupt Americans.  It is most revealing, right on the mark.

Temptation will visit us many times in our lives; we cannot escape it. They say that the better a person tries to be, the more the devil will tempt that person.  But, God will always give us the means and the strength to overcome each and every temptation.  Once, St. Catharine of Siena was asked when a person would stop being tempted by sexual sins.  She quipped, "Twelve hours after they're dead!"

If we're responsible for young people, how can we help them: have such wonderful relationships that we can, without embarrassment, talk with them about everything, and that they feel so comfortable with us that they can come to us for any concern.  We must purposely talk with them about the evils they may encounter. We can never assume that they'll hear about the important things in school or church.  We can't just hand them a book, either.

Then what is our responsibility to ourselves: Pray much, vow to never once give in to what we know is wrong, ask God, "Just let me recognize temptations when they come.  I know you'll help me not give in."

Hanging Fork Creek and Deer Tracks

How's this for a front yard!  Lincoln County, Kentucky, U.S.A.

Today I spent a most pleasant day in the company of my long-term friend, Pat, on her property in Lincoln County, Kentucky.  We took a long stroll up and down hills past wooded areas and fields to Hanging Fork Creek.  It's a fairly wide creek, as creeks go.  She pointed out deer tracks in the soft areas along the trails.  They're quite different than the separate round pads of cats and bears; they look like two long toes but are actually hoof imprints.

There were quite a lot of these large 'fruits,' from the Osage Orange Tree, that looked like brains to me.  I think they must be inedible.  They're lime green on the trees before they drop.

Hanging Fork Creek, Lincoln County, Kentucky.  Some ice along the shore is still present from our cold snap earlier in the week.

Hay in the fields in neat rows, ready for winter use.

The countryside was so quiet and peaceful that I remarked, "I could easily get addicted to all this space and quiet.  This doesn't even seem like exercise."  Pat informed me, "Wait till Spring.  It's quite loud with all the birds out."  Pat's dog, Buddy, accompanied us.  He was gleefully running around, looking for skunks, rabbits, anything else he could find and chase.  Buddy was unsuccessful today.

We lunched at the BlueBird Cafe in the nearby small town of Stanford.  It was large and busy, not what I expected in a small town. My selection was a Fried Green Tomato Sandwich on a homemade wheat bun and coleslaw. I would highly recommend this restaurant.  Pat says they're getting ready to expand into a larger building and take on catering.  No wonder they're so successful!  I know I'll return!

Main Street, Stanford, Kentucky: unique shops.

Jan, in front of the "Kentucky Soaps & Such" store, across the street from the BlueBird, Main Street, Stanford, Kentucky, January 10, 2014.

We poked around this interesting store and were able to try out their Sugar Scrub which is an exfoliant.  The soaps, creams, shampoos and conditioners were displayed in antique tubs and sinks.  They are made in the basement of the store.  Fresh goat's milk is the main ingredient in their products which contain no preservatives or artificial chemicals.  I bought lavender bar soaps and hand cream.  You may view their products at www.kentuckysoapsandsuch.com.  We're told they ship anywhere.  We went through an archway to an adjoining art gallery with unique paintings, glass, and metal sculptures and bells.

A huge courthouse in a small town: the Lincoln County Courthouse in Stanford, Kentucky, January 10, 2014.  Note that there are tall columns on three sides.  It was built in 1909, the 4th structure on the site.  Lincoln County was once a large county in Virginia.

The 'U's' look like 'V's' on the courthouse name.

Bless her heart, Pat left up her Christmas decorations so I could see them!  SO beautiful!!

Pat's antique Nativity Set.  Pat is a retired teacher.  She researched the animals that Jesus may have had as pets, found that the people 2,000 years ago in Israel may have kept sheep but not dogs and cats as we have.  She bought extra sheep for this set which her grandchildren love.

Pat's collection of Santas in her dining room.

Pat, left, and me, Jan: Our First 'Selfie!'

Treasure all your friends, treasure all your small towns and visit as many as you can!  I promised to return in the Spring when there were apples on her trees in her orchard and "stay as long as I have to, to see the deer nibbling on them!"