Have you heard of "helicopter moms?" They're the mothers who constantly hover over their child or children, doing everything for them - homework, making decisions, choosing not only their clothes but all their extra-curricular activities, even to the extent of applying to colleges and applying for jobs for them. They think they're doing this all in the best interests of the child, but this bully behavior is really crippling their children! This constant over-seeing makes the child eventually incapable of making any decisions.
Pity the poor child of the helicopter mom! (Dads may be guilty of this, too; I'm not certain as I don't personally know one.) Since mom actually does all their homework (they just write down the answers!), they not only do not have much knowledge of their subjects, they don't care about school in the slightest. These moms take away all incentive to succeed in school - and, in life!
The mother drives the child relentlessly to work and succeed but since she does the child's work for him or her, the child has no desire to do well. What drives a woman to drive herself into a frenzy to do all the child's work? She feels her child must get into the best college and get a degree in whatever the mother thinks is important, to get a good job.
Another common quality of the helicopter mom is making sure her child has the BEST of everything while growing up. Somehow, the child has, in his or her own room, a computer, TV, lots of electronic games, very expensive toys and clothes, not to mention the latest iPhone. This also takes all drive to work away from the child. Why bother? Of course, mom makes sure, at the first opportunity, when the child is old enough, there's a great car! Common sense tells us, why should they work when they already have what they want?
There's another category of women who ROB: those who take away every incentive their husbands have to help them, while at the same time loudly complaining to all who hear, about what a deadbeat he is. When gently questioned, "Did he ever try to help you with the housework?" these women report, "Oh, sure. He made the bed so horribly I had to completely remake it." Or, "Yes, one time he washed the dishes for me but there were a few that were not quite clean so I had to wash them all again." Don't they see that their perfectionism is what killed the real desire of their husbands to help with the day-to-day house duties? If someone re-did every task you completed, wouldn't you stop doing the job?
And what happens to the adult child after college: he or she moves back home. There is a ridiculous number of new graduates living at home that could be independent. Sure, our economy is terrible. Most of these adults - and many others, sadly - can't find a job in their line of work. They may or may not keep looking. Meanwhile, they don't work!!! There are plenty of entry-level jobs available that many Americans think are 'beneath' them. I don't think so!! Work at fast food! Work as a clerk! Get two jobs if you need to! That's what us 'old-fashioned' grannies and grandpas used to do. It fed us and our families and paid the bills.
Am I being too hard on the little pampered pets? You Tell Me.
Lord, I thank you that my children are all adults! I thank you for the years they did ALL their homework. Was I wrong not to hover? Was I a bad parent to tell my teens, "If you want brand name clothes, Get a Job? Please help all parents and growing-up children do the right thing!
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