Thursday, February 13, 2014

The "S" Word

It happens all too frequently in our world, and each event is of cosmic, far-reaching consequences: suicide.  Memories came to mind, sparked by an article in "UKnow," University of Kentucky e-mail news, February 11, "Teens Give Encouraging Words, Facts About Youth Suicide During Awareness Event" part of the "Spread the Love-a-Thon event sponsored by the U.K. Division of Adolescent Medicine."

As part of a hospital Behavioral Medicine team, I cared for many, many depressed adults and teens, some of whom had attempted suicide.  Most of the women had taken overdoses of all kinds of drugs, all legal, some prescription.  Most of the men had tried more violent means.  All survived. We tried our best to help them all; I believe we succeeded with many of them, convincing them that, truly, Life is Worth Living!

What did we do?  We gave them rest, medications, counseling.  They were hospitalized, they had to face whatever problem was causing them such trauma.  We could never tell them how to run their lives.  The best we could do was make known to them that they had OPTIONS, perhaps those they had never heard of or considered.

One young depressed man who had not attempted to hurt himself told me, "I thought many times of killing myself.  But in my mind was 'Thou shall not kill.'  I knew even killing myself was a terrible sin and I didn't want to go to hell."  Religion helps so much, especially in the darkest of times!

They say that a suicide of a family member affects the entire extended family for generations.  Everyone questions, "Why didn't I see it coming?  What could I have done to prevent it?  Surely, he (or she) knew I loved him?"

Myth:  If someone is talking about suicide, they won't try it.  Fact: it may be a final cry for help.  What should we do if we hear this?  Take it seriously and ask, "How are you planning on doing this?"  IF there is a definite plan, the person must be hospitalized immediately, for their own safety.

Our thinking our loved ones know we love them may or may not be correct. We would do well to tell them we love them, not once, but frequently.  This is the most important thing we can do in our families!  No one wants to feel totally alone, totally unloved.  We don't want this to happen.

Another important thing we could do is spend time with those we love - there is NO substitute for this.  If we're always busy doing our own thing, what could they think?  That they're not important to us!

I cannot tell you the many hours our hospital Dialysis Team spent dialyzing out (filtering from their blood) antifreeze from patients of all ages who had attempted to poison themselves to death.  It took treatments of 5 to 8 hours each.  Now, I understand that additives are in antifreeze to make it taste so terrible it is no longer like drinking koolaid.  We prayed that our patients' kidneys would not be permanently damaged.

The teen conference event above was very useful if it made folks aware of a problem from which some people never returned, if it helped people of all ages look at their relationships, slow down and care for others.

Another item we need to be aware of is the fast-growing Culture of Death in the United States. Either we believe that God is in charge of Life and God is in charge of Death or, we are our own gods.  We, none of us, want to end up as victims.

Dear God in heaven, help us make our world a more loving place for each and every one of us, your children, your loved ones.  We know you love us and will tell us how to do this loving!


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