Situation: Time and time again, since he was a very young boy, Chip wouldn't listen to anyone. "Chip, his mother hollered, "I told you to stay away from him. Why oh why did you hang out with that loser? He stole hubcaps last week. If you're with him when he gets caught, you'll get in trouble, too!" It happened and Chip got a suspended sentence since it was his first offense.
Then he grew up and had serious problems. "Don't marry her, she's bad news, Chip, I've seen her out with two other men since you've been engaged." Chip didn't listen and married his first girlfriend anyway. Several months later, Chip caught her cheating on him in their own home. So they divorced.
Decision after decision, Chip's friends and family would see disaster in the foreground of his life and tried to warn him. "Chip, don't give her money. She'll just blow it on drugs, the way she always does. And she might get you hooked, too." Chip lost thousands of dollars on that girlfriend.
Chip always went for the exciting women with flashy, immodest clothes and great figures. One girlfriend told Chip she really needed money for emergency dental work. Chip gave her quite a lot of cash. Instead, she spent it on fake boobs. Chip was actually embarrassed with the results.
"Chip, why is a hard-working guy like you thinking about letting her live with you? She can't hold a job for three weeks. Are you sure you even want to think of going out with her? She is just playing you for a meal ticket." Chip didn't listen. This woman soon got pregnant and tried to bully Chip into marrying her. He wouldn't marry her but supports the child and kicked the girlfriend out. His friends tell him, "Chip, why don't you at least get a paternity test? You don't even know if the child is yours." Chip can't quite bring himself to do it. Occasionally the woman tries to sweet-talk, then bully Chip into marriage but first, she wants Chip to put her name on the deed to his house. Praise the Lord, he won't do it!
One time Chip asked his best friend, "Why do I have to learn everything the hard way? Is, perhaps, after all these years - Chip is now in his mid-forties - Chip getting at least a small insight into his behavior?
Lessons learned: It's very hard to watch a good friend or close family member self-destruct, especially if it is repetitive. It doesn't take long to find out that the very person who always asks you for advice and never takes it, just wants to vent, just wants an audience. I'm not sure if it is kinder just to listen and know it won't matter or to be confrontational and say, "Look, I feel like no matter what I say, you're going to do _______ anyway, so I'm not going to give you my thoughts on this."
What about us? Could we be considered "blockheads?" Perhaps we're not on the wild side like Chip, but do we do things we know are wrong over and over, year after year? Our God is patient with us, never ties us up and tells us we're stupid, gently reminds us so that we know for sure certain actions are wrong. Are we like St. Augustine was, when he was young and wild: "God, I want to be good, but not just yet!" How do we know we'll be here tomorrow so we can repent?
Outcome: Chip has, for the moment, sworn off women. He says he's been burned too much, he just won't date at all. We'll see how long his resolution lasts. He seems to spend all his energies on the child. That is not a bad thing!
Oh, Lord, we pray, please continue to be patient with us but please keep pointing out our mistakes and sins. Please give us the strength to 'be good - now!'
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