The Little Green Woman

Situation:  She was my dear friend, Louisa, and it took years for me to figure out what was her problem with me.  I'm not even sure she was aware of it herself.  Louisa was jealous and envious of me.  How do I know?  Whenever something good happened to me, no matter what it was, she'd downgrade it and 'rain on my parade.'

Years ago, our school system started a "Gifted and Talented" program.  Every mother I knew, including myself, thought ALL our children belonged in this program. We ALL helped ALL our children apply for this program.  After all, it would mean special classes and special attention, not to mention the honor of being in the program, for the children selected.  

At first, there were only a few openings per grade. The selection process was highly subjective.  In addition to good grades previously, the children had to demonstrate high interest in and a degree of competence in each area.  For example, to apply for the "Arts" categories, you had to demonstrate a dance, play a musical selection on your instrument of choice.  For "Academic" categories, like "Writing," you had to submit a piece you had written. 

I can't say whether or not the children cared at all about this program.  But we mothers did!  We loved our children, of course and felt they deserved it.  After months of waiting, the chosen were announced.  One of my children was the only child of the mothers in my circle who was chosen.  Everyone was so happy for me and congratulated me!  Everyone, that is, except Louisa.  With a scowl on her face, she very sarcastically told me, "How did YOU manage that!"  This implied I bribed the teachers or something of the sort.  I couldn't believe my ears and eyes!  She was positively green with jealousy!

Lessons learned:  When my daughters started having children who tried out for various teams and projects - and did well, they started having the same jealousy problems and asked me what to do.  I told them, "No one will be jealous of you or your child if you're fat, pimply, greasy, shy and just sit in a corner.  Go do your best and encourage the best in your children.  Someone will always try to drag you down.  Ignore it and go on."

For sure, I learned from my dear mom and grandmother who, while I was growing up and had jealousy problems, would tell me, over and over, "Consider the source."  In other words, if someone is mean and nasty to you, it's their problem!  Don't feel sad!  You know how good you are!

What exactly is 'envy?'  It is sadness over someone else's blessing.  Envy leads to jealousy which hopes for harm to the other person, like if the other person looks better, I look worse.  Sadness comes from the Devil himself!  What is the antidote for this: Joy!!

Outcome:  Although Louisa really tried to be nice to me and everyone, over the years to come, she destroyed what love I felt for her by more serious jealousies and baseless accusations.  In time, she moved far away and I felt no loss whatsoever. (I feel it is a tragedy of universal proportions to destroy any love!)

Our Take-away: It is God who gives us and our children various talents, gifts, and opportunities.  We are all different.  We can try our best with what we have.  We should celebrate everyone's triumphs!  We're all in the grand affair called 'life' together!

Lord God, we pray, thank you for whatever gifts you have bestowed on us.  Help us not be envious of those who have what we don't have.  We know you love us very much and give us every thing we need, in abundance!  Thank you, sweet Lord!