Mothers-in-Law, for Better or Worse

Family relationships are very delicate, can be very fulfilling, yet are usually demanding.  The mother-in-law role seems to be widely characterized as totally a witch on wheels, inciting hatred in all she encounters.  My own mother-in-law, the dearly departed Sally, and I got along fine, right from the beginning of my relationship and marriage to her son.  It could be that I actually was accepted even before that because I babysat for her youngest son, not to mention that she and my mother were fine friends.

Sally was a great seamstress when I was a poor young mother.  I wanted to be a bridesmaid in my two best friends' weddings but couldn't afford even one, let along two, expensive 'bought' bridesmaid gowns.  So she helped me sew the first one for my pal, Nancy's wedding.  We couldn't find a pattern to match the others' dresses (which were bought) so she designed a dress without a pattern!!  It fit perfectly!  And it cost a fraction of what a bought dress would cost.

In the evenings when we were working on the dress, Sally picked mint from her yard, made tea, and we pretended we were drunk!  It was great fun.  Meanwhile, my grandmother watched my baby.

For my other friend, Pam's wedding, Pam's dad bought the dress for me.  Pam explained, "Your dad bought my plane ticket to your wedding, so my dad will buy the dress."  I appreciated that! Both weddings were spectacular!  Pam and Nancy were both marrying naval officers.  The flashing of the swords forming an arch over the new bride and groom at the weddings added a quite elegant touch.

I feel sorry for the families of those mothers-in-law who are truly witches.  One sad son who had talked to his mother quietly said, "Every time I talk to her, God kills a puppy in heaven."  I think that means that even God is unhappy at such a wicked woman.  I suspect that most mothers-in-law behave somewhere in the middle of these extremes of behavior.

Many mothers-in-law, and also, the fathers-in-law, positively know that there does not breathe a man or woman good enough for their daughter or son.  And they find ways of causing mayhem.  One young woman I know lamented, "She never once had anything nice to say about me or to me.  I will never set eyes on her again.  I will not subject myself to that kind of abuse."

Lord in Heaven, help me to be a very, very good mother-in-law to all my adult children by marriage; you know how dearly I love them, each and every one!