Once upon a time, there lived two very selfish and immature people, she in her house and he in his house. Both had never been married, being serial cohabiters, but they cohabited with each other for a few months several years ago, resulting in a beautiful, smart, active, adorable child.
He is a quite successful businessman; his house would be called 'grand' by anyone. She usually sponges off relatives but presently works and rents a small house. Everyone who knows her considers her a true, old-fashioned "gold digger" (will do anything to marry a man she thinks has 'money'). And why not! She learned this from her mother who 'moved up' with each new divorce and remarriage (and there were many).
For a while, they talked about marriage, just for the child, but he is an alcoholic, which she can't stand, and she uses hard, illegal drugs quite a lot, which he won't tolerate. When they cohabited, they fought and fought - over everything. He would have married her but she insisted that his very nice house be also put in her name. He not only refused to put her name on the deed to the house, he wanted her to sign a pre-nuptial agreement stating that he would owe her nothing if they got divorced. She refused.
He deserves credit for faithfully giving the woman child support and taking the child home every other weekend. Many men would make excuses and bail out. He even paid her pregnancy and delivery costs.
Meanwhile the child has grown to be near school age. And both the man and woman have grown to dearly love the child. The child is starting to notice that some of her friends live with both their mommy and daddy and is beginning to ask questions, "Why do I live in two houses?"
The woman has changed. She no longer insists that her name be on the house deed. They plan to be married soon. Is this a reason to get married: ONLY to give their child a home?
Who knows the answer? Only God! I've known some couples whose marriage would be likely to last only a few months, who have been married many years. And others who split up and shock all the friends and family who had no idea the marriage was in trouble. No one can predict the motivation of another. As far as this couple goes, I have no idea if either one of them has overcome their substance addiction.
Let's recap the blog entries with the theme, "Reasons to Get Married."
#1: "The Mail Order Bride," December 11, 2013
#2: "Military," February 8, 2014
#3: "Baby on the Way!" February 11, 2014
#4: "Money!" February 26, 2014
#5: "Prestige!" March 6, 2014
#6: "To Become a Citizen," March 20, 2014
#7: "Same Religion," March 26, 2014
#8: "To Please Our Parents," April 12, 2014
#9: "Baby Clock Ticking!" May 31, 2014
When checking this, I noticed that some of the blog numbers are incorrect, which I'll correct, but the dates are correct. Eventually, I'll explore the MAIN REASON a man and woman should get married, for LOVE. But is this reason enough? Never a dull moment in the world of blogs and relationships!
Lord in heaven, I believe You are One God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. You are a family. You are Love. Please help us find love and create love in our families!
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