A middle-aged (40-ish) male named Jason was in a heated argument with his live-in girlfriend, Sammy. One whose whole head turned pink when he got angry, Jason was almost "as red as a tomato," Sammy reported. "I suppose I might be too much of a pushover," she said, "Jason expects me to work hard both at my job and at home while he does nothing. I means NOTHING! All I wanted was for him to bring his snacky dishes from the family room to the kitchen so I could wash them. Is that too much to ask?"
Sammy just decided to keep the peace, get the dishes herself, and bring them to the kitchen. No big deal. But Jason was mad and didn't stop. He hollered at her, she was lazy, messy, and a terrible mother. That did it for Sammy. "Criticize anything you want about me but don't tell me I'm a bad mother. I try really hard to be a mother," she countered. They both had children from previous marriages. Jason didn't want Sammy's children around at all. Yet he expected that Sammy would accompany him to all his children's sports games.
Sammy vowed to herself that this time he did it, he was toast, she would leave him - for good - for the last time - at her earliest convenience. Jason finished it off with a screaming loud statement, "Any woman in town would be proud to have me!"
Finally, Sammy saw Jason for what he is: a lazy, unloving, poor-excuse-for-a-man person that was just using her for sex. And he has a totally inflated sense of his own worth! He was kind of good-looking, at least he had all his hair, he took good care of his body, lifting weights and all, worked at a nondescript job, but he was mean clear through!
Sammy also mentioned that she was really sorry she spent so much money on him over the 4 years they had been together. "I'd be a rich woman today if it wasn't for that," she realized, "well, not rich but a lot better off than I am now. I'll never get it back." The only thing I could console her with was, "Well, some lessons you learn are expensive."
Never wanting to be an "I-told-you-so" type person because I think it's hurtful and Sammy was hurting enough already, I just reminded myself of how when Sammy jumped into the relationship and left him for the first time, I told her, "You know what, I just hated seeing you tied up with him, wasting your time when you could be looking for someone really nice."
This morning I happened onto a TV talk from a Sociologist talking about how children succeed in life, how they come to get good education and jobs, and have lasting marriages and children. The best chance in life for children is the family in which both mom and dad are married to each other. This was new to me: children in either families in which the wife or husband is not their biological parent OR families in which the woman and man are co-habiting, fare the same AS CHILDREN WITH SINGLE MOMS. Those children end up with less education, more unemployment, fewer jobs with lower pay, may go to jail before they're 30, and will tend to get divorced IF they get married.
Lord in Heaven, we always have so much and so many people to pray for! Besides the usual family, friends, sick ones, today we would like to ask for you to protect children and families. Keep them together, help us promote healthy families any way we can. As always, we thank you for everything!
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