The Old Flame

Situation:  Winny and Clay met in college, in the same class.  Clay was instantly attracted to the vivacious, friendly Winny. He asked her to date, but she thought of him as a friend.  He was plain looking, pleasant, mannerly, but not her type.  Winny was dating an older man she had met in a bar.

After the semester was over, Winny married the older man.  She stayed in college, finished and found a good job.  The harder she worked, the less the older man worked.  They had several children. He turned out to be verbally abusive, Winny would not tolerate it, and divorced him.  Sometimes Winny found herself fantasizing about how her life would have been if she had dated Clay instead.

Years passed.  It was very hard for her to work and raise the children but, with help from her family, she did it.  And then she ran into Clay at a shopping mall.  They chatted for several minutes and stopped to have coffee.  After all these years, Clay was still attracted to Winny who had kept her figure and her long, dark hair.  Winny thought Clay was positively handsome now!  Winny told Clay she was divorced.  Clay told Winny of his terrible marriage and asked her to date again.

Lessons learned:  Many young adults are attracted to the 'peacocks' of the opposite sex.  These are the super-attractive, super-friendly, 'men or women of the world,' very sophisticated, usually heavy drinking, people on the prowl.  Beware of instant attraction!  It's the calm, steady person who will stay in the relationship for the long haul.  Some young people seem to be attracted to much older men or women, and feel flattered of the attention they receive.

Outcome:  Winny politely declined to date the still-married Clay.  She felt in her heart that helping another end a marriage was no way to begin a relationship.  There was also the matter of Adultery.  Winny wouldn't do it!  She is still single.  She hasn't seen Clay at all.