Situation: Holly is a single woman in her early thirties. She's known a man, Jude, for more than ten years. When they first met, Holly and Jude were very much attracted to each other. They dated for several weeks, then Jude told Holly that he was "separated from his wife and they were getting a divorce very soon." Holly wanted no part of such a dishonest relationship and dropped Jude immediately.
Fast forward three years. Holly had a phone message from Jude, "Just want you to know, if you ever need to talk, or need to cry on my shoulder, I'm here for you." Holly ignored the message and never called him. She had heard from a friend that he was divorced and married again.
Four more years passed. Jude appeared on Holly's doorstep. "Holly, I'm divorced now. Let's talk." Holly didn't even let him inside her apartment. She told him, "I'm in a relationship now. No thanks."
Lessons learned: Consider a married or otherwise committed person "off-limits." Check out the marital status of your potential date before you start dating. You dare not give your heart to someone so horribly shallow & callous to cheat on his/her mate!
Don't believe a married person when they share with you about how badly they are being treated by their spouse. They may be lying. If they're telling the truth, it's THEIR PROBLEM, NOT YOURS!
Beware of serial marry-and-divorce people. With each successive marriage, the odds are greater that they will divorce sooner.
Outcome: Holly is not pressured either to date or to marry. She feels that if she dated a mature man who was compatible, she would marry. She dates very nice men, occasionally. Holly is happy in her job, her church, her apartment, her cool car and LIFE!
Good advice. Lots of people can learn from it...!!
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